Your Partner & Your Plastic Surgery
How to Convince Your Partner that Plastic Surgery is Worth It
Procedures once reserved for top celebrities or for the rich and famous are now available – as well as financially attainable – for men and women across Australia.
Tummy tucks, injection treatments, liposuction, breast augmentations, and nose jobs are just a few of the ways people are reclaiming their confidence, restoring a more youthful skin tone.
But what if you’re keen to have surgery, yet your partner isn’t convinced of it’s value?
Here are some tips for convincing your partner that what you want is worth it.
Plastic Surgery is often about helping people with confidence. It can help to reduce concern about certain features that garner unwanted attention (excessively large breasts, for example) or to reduce signs of ageing that leave us looking older than we feel.
But your partner may not think it’s enough of a concern – or may state they love you ‘just the way they are’ – yet you’re convinced surgery is worth it, and you can see the value in having a procedure done.
Here’s what to consider when discussing your surgery options and surgery goals with your partner.
Many people don’t fully understand other’s motivations for surgery, and each person’s reasons are very unique to that individual.
There are some common themes, however, and it’s important to be clear on why YOU want surgery, and what you expect in terms of outcomes. Is it to lose a bulging tummy (or to uplift saggy breasts) after having children, so that you feel more feminine again? Is it to lose the excess folds of skin after massive weight change, so you can finally celebrate your significant weight change? Or is it to augment an area of your body you felt was out of balance?
Is it to regain a more youthful facial appearance when gravity and sun damage have left your skin looking older than you prefer?
The top reasons people often seek plastic & cosmetic surgery are:
- To enhance a feature they feel is out of balance with the rest of the body or face
- To reduce a feature that is overly prominent OR a focus of unwanted attention and non-welcomed comments (e.g., teasing or bullying)
- To enhance a feature that did not properly develop (for example, corrective surgery to remedy tuberous breasts or asymmetrical breasts)
- To correct a deformity or repair tissue damage from an injury (for example, a Rhinoplasty to fix a crooked or broken nose or to repair a deviated septum, or to reshape & resize your nose to better fit your other features)
- To fight premature signs of ageing (deep wrinkles, lax skin or skin damage due to long-term sun exposure)
- To reduce excess skin folds or repair & reshape the body after significant weight loss or after childbirth (e.g. breast lift, circumferential Abdominoplasty, tummy tuck, body lift surgery, arm lift surgery)
Either genetics (not liking what you were born with), or lifestyle (sun damage or childbirth) can often wreak havoc on the skin and body.
Sometimes you might want surgery to correct something you were born with, such as remedying a feature you never felt comfortable with – or altering a feature that garners unwanted attention (e.g., a crooked or bumpy nose). Other times, it’s life’s events that have changed your body or face in a way you’re just not happy with; leaving you with a physical attribute that you really want to change.
Time and life events, such as weight changes, can really change our bodies. With advances in technology and reasonable surgery prices, more men and women are taking steps to reshape their bodies or revitalise their faces when exercise or skin care regimes no longer work.
As long as you do sufficient research on your options and are well aware of the potential benefits and potential risks of surgery, then it’s ultimately your decision.
But at the same time, it’s important you have a supportive environment in which to undertake such an important journey, including post-surgery support. And if you’re also equally sharing your payment methods, then it’s something that you likely need BOTH of you to see the value in – or agree to what you can each spend separately on what you want.
You’re ready for Plastic Surgery – but Is your partner on board?
Surgery is serious business – so it’s crucial that you are choosing plastic surgery for your own purposes – rather than choosing it to please someone else.
It’s also key that if you are ready to have surgery and are well informed about the procedures – that you’re not thwarted by a partner who simply doesn’t understand how much it means to you.
There are many reasons people consider plastic surgery – warding off premature aging, correcting facial features, appearing slimmer or tighter – but what do you do if you’re ready for plastic surgery but your partner isn’t on board?
Though surgery is a very personal decision, ideally your partner supports you, both physically and emotionally.
Discussing with your partner the reasons you want surgery or injectables – and for weight loss surgery, your post-surgery plan to keep weight off – should go a long way.
Many partners will tell you that you don’t “need” plastic surgery – and in most instances, aside from health concerns, they’re right.
It’s not about your partner – it’s about YOU – and your comfort & confidence with your appearance
What you should try to convey to your partner is that you want the surgery or injectables – not to impress them or anyone else – but to feel better about yourself (and this should be true).
Depending on if you share funds or not, you should also discuss plastic surgery in terms of payment methods.
Most plastic surgery procedures are elective and therefore not covered by insurance.
Depending on how you and your partner approach payment methods, plastic surgery may need to be a mutual decision.
In the end, some people have plastic surgery without the consent of their partner and others forgo the surgery because their partners aren’t in agreement. If a person really wants it and their partner isn’t on board, it’s also possible that resentment will build.
So it’s best to have calm, possibly even planned discussions where you cover all the concerns and motivations involved with your partner.
Conversations should also include the potential risks and costs, as well as what it might mean to YOU in terms of outcomes (e.g., do you believe you will feel much happier, or more appearance confident, or have more freedom to wear different types of clothing or to avoid being teased about your appearance).
What you decide should ultimately be up to you.
Plastic Surgery Should Be For You
On the other hand, you should not pursue plastic surgery if you have hesitations – you should simply research it further and talk to other patients who have had the procedure you are currently considering.
Ask them what you want to know, such as:
- How did surgery change them?
- How did they choose their Surgeon?
- What was healing & recovery like?
- Would they do it again?
- What’s been better after Surgery?
- Has anything been worse?
Never choose Surgery to please a partner
Some patients come in for consultations at the insistence of their partner. This creates multiple issues for the partners as well as you if you’re the one being told you ‘need’ surgery to be attractive to your partner.
Plastic surgery is a very personal decision and should be made by you and you alone.
After all, you have to live in your body every day and should be happy with it!
Do your Research – and show your partner real patient stories about how it impacted others
Many patients who participate in online forums claim a high “worth it” rate for surgery results.
You can look at Real Self or The Plastic Surgery Hub or the Plastic Surgery Forums to read more about how it impacted others, and show your partner.
If your partner is on board with wanting you to feel confident and happy within yourself, and you have good communication, chances are they will see WHY you are wanting Surgery. You can also discuss WHAT to expect, WHEN you want to have it done, and WHERE you will be having your surgery and recovery.
Be sure to let them know that you might be emotional and second-guessing yourself in the weeks IMMEDIATELY following your surgery – this is common for most patients, but after the healing process settles down, you’ll likely reach that point of saying “WORTH IT” – as so many patients report in public forums.
Our Surgeons Encourage Partner Involvement and Your Partner is Most Welcomed to Co-Attend your Consultations
Our team of Plastic Surgeons would be happy to discuss the pros, cons, recovery details, and payment methods with you and your partner.
If you’d like to know more about procedures and our Leading team of Specialist Plastic Surgeons, submit a confidential enquiry form or phone our Patient Care Coordinators during clinic hours on (03) 8849 1444.
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For more information about Cosmetic and Plastic Surgery options and research in Australia.